“Walk a mile in someone else’s shoes” is a common platitude taught to us from the time we are children. It is a phrase that is meant to teach us something. But what is it meant to teach? Empathy is the idea that we as humans have the ability to not only understand but feel and share in the experiences of other humans who may be going through something we never have personally. How would it be possible to feel an emotion about a situation you have never even come close to experiencing yourself? Empathy makes that possible.
Most people, with few exceptions due to cognitive impairments, are born with the capability to be empathetic. But sometimes when we are young, if we do not have a person in our life to teach or model it to us, it can be difficult to unlock this potential. Learning and practicing empathy is a skill that can be learned at any point, no matter your age or spot in life.
Empathy does indeed have much value. Empathy can help us relate to others. It can help us in our personal and intimate relationships. For example, let’s pretend your partner or spouse is a volunteer firefighter. You may not be a firefighter, so you do not have any personal experience to draw on for the hardships they face. However, if you have empathy you can almost imagine what it *must* be like to walk through fire for the most unselfish of reasons. You can close your eyes and imagine the fear, the bravery, the sadness at the end of a bad call. You can call on your own experiences of hardship to help inform your understanding of something you have not experienced. You can feel those emotions and relate to your partner or spouse. It will only serve to strengthen your relationship with the ability to relate and communicate on such a deep level. It can time and work to unearth this skill. Some people come by it more naturally and some people must apply themselves more diligently. But their reward remains the same: making a connection with others through their choice to vulnerably feel alongside. Every person on earth has their own unique experiences which color their opinions and world view. No two people have had the exact same life experiences. Some of our current issues in society could begin to be healthily addressed if we were open to hearing the different experiences of those around us, and we chose to have space for and feel with experiences we have not personally had.
